Attic

Been having a bit of a sort out of the attic. Not the one between the ears, but the real one up between the rafters.

Now, this is one of those jobs that gets postponed and postponed, but I was looking for something and I thought I knew where it was (he didn't as it turned out - ed) and unwisely I was determined to find it.

So Sunday afternoon, when it was bitterly cold outside and it was merely cold in the attic, the hatch was opened, the ladder lowered, and my loins were girded ready for action, Luckily I have a system which was put into effect when the boxes went up into the attic a couple of years ago. But even with the initial best of intentions things in the attic have lost a little shape since then, as you will see below (sigh - ed)

However, a slight aide before I start the story. I do have a number of theories to do with putting boxes in the attic, namely the following rules:

1. Don't do it at all. Never ever, ever put boxes in the attic. Remember don't do it, because if you do, at some point there will be something you need that is in the attic and will not been findable or alternatively you are moving house and need to 'Clear the Attic', which involves bringing the boxes down from the attic, repackaging the contents into newer, less decrepit boxes, moving the said boxes to  the following house, putting the boxes back up into the next attic. I recall taking two days to empty an attic at one house, luckily, the contents never went back into the attic of the following house, as I applied rule 1 very firmly indeed. 
2. If you do feel you need to put boxes of 'stuff' in the attic, catalogue the contents of each box and put that list on top of the box, take a photo of the contents of the box and number and date the box on both the lid and the side. The box can then be put into the attic. Ensure that the photos with the content picture and list/catalogure are put onto computer  - preferably in the cloud. Note: As and when more stuff is put in the attic, apply the same actions, otherwise madness ensues
3. Simply write on the box lid a brief overview of the contents (David's ref books, Star Trek TNG DVDs, etc - ed)
4. Put boxes in the attic all higgledypiggledy with no form or structure, because we all know that is the real way to do it.
5. Date and time boxes, which then, if remain unopened for X years are taken out of the attic and binned/recylced without opening. Remember, unopened, because you know as well as I do, if you open the box, you will find a reason to redate the box and leave in the attic. Remember, boxes in the attic are not just for Xmas, they are for life!

Now having tried, 1, 2, 3, 4 and more recently 5. at different times and in different houses, I have come to the conclusion, that 2 is the one that should work (whaddya mean should - suspicious ed).

There is a large CAVEAT in that if the boxes' lids are swapped whilst digging through boxes at a later time, this particular methodology fails unless as part of methodology 2, you write the number of the box on the side of the box as well!

Now, in our house, we have in fact implemented both Rules 1 & 2, with a little 3, 4  and 5 thrown in to make things that much more interesting. All of  Bridget's gear is boxed, photographed, numbered and dated and placed in number order in one half of the attic (excellent, well done Bridget - ed). Strangely, we never seem to need to find anything from Bridget's boxes, possibly as that would be simply too easy.

The other half of the attic (well considerably less now, as most of it has been brought downstairs to clear out - ed) is in a mix of 3/4 with lids changed to protect the innocent. So a box entitled "Ref books", which should contain Software Development Reference books, is found to contain Science Fiction books. A box named DVDs, contains a couple of bags of marbles and a treasure chest (and there was I thinking you'd lost your marbles - ed).

So, why am I clearing out the attic, I needed to find something (and when that mood is upon him, nothing, absolutely nothing will stop him, sigh - ed) and as part of that search I wanted to find a specific Fantasy book that I knew (possibly not - ed) was in the attic, Alvin Maker, by Orson Scott Card (though he did find books 2,3 and 5 in that series, failed to find the first, sigh - ed).

But, given that the looked for item was not to be found by use of any kind of  intelligent search algorithm, as I simply 'knew' it was up there, and I 'knew' what was in the box with it; due to the astounding failure to apply Rule 2, when my stuff was put into the attic the search became a look through almost every box in my half of the attic, and unsurprisingly result in a "failed to find" event; followed by an initial give up, "I'm never going to find it, mutter, mutter, Dick Dastardly", moment, that caused Bridget to apply, "Davey Control Rule 1 - feed and water at regular intervals".

So, we retreated downstairs for a cup of tea and something to eat (two fried eggs on toast, with a grind or two of black pepper, hmm - culinary ed). This was then followed by a return to the attic, now with my batteries fully charged and applying the, "You must have moved it", Rule, that is, as we had failed to find the item in my half of the attic, it must have somehow been moved to Bridget's half and it wasn't me that moved it...

So we ended up taking a look through Bridget's half of the attic only to find some unnamed, unnumbered boxes of  mine (oops - ed), which of course, did not contain the sought for article. 

At this point, the frustration had reached, "Danger Will Robinson", levels, (with siren and the flashing red lights - ed), and I decided unilaterally to,  "Sort Out", (in best Ray Winston, cockney Londoner fashion - ed), the attic good and proper. Well, obviously only my half, as Bridget's is well, already what you might call, sorted.

So what then. Every single box in my half of the attic was gone through, with all books sorted into ones to go downstairs (as he will never read them again - ed)  to be sold or given away. Alton has a very understanding 2nd hand bookseller, who will take certain types of Science Fiction and Fantasy books, so I might even make a couple of quid (enough to buy the book you failed to find? - ed)

After another hour in the dusty cold environs of the attic, when we reached the last couple of boxes, guess what, we found the box we were looking for, which, bizarrely enough, did have a description of the contents, including the item that I was looking for, written on the lid!

Somehow it had been overlooked in the intial reconnaissance (I would say, "Now there's a surprise", but that might elicit a slap to the head - cowardly ed) , as would almost naturally be the case. So, success in the end, but the failure to find the Alvin Maker book was a bit of a blow.

But, my half of the attic is, "Well Sorted", now, so I know where my marbles are (you must feel so proud - ed), I know where all my LPs are,  I know where all my CDs are, I know where all my DVDs are, the books that are being kept to potentially read are in just a couple of boxes, my work related reference books are in boxes with lids named "Ref books", it is almost like a plan. (Did you apply any of  Rule 2? - ed).

All the stuff to go, has been brought down, a dozen or so board wargames from the 70-80s, also Strategy & Tactics, Fire & Movement, Phoenix, Ares, Omni magazines, which according to the web, are now worth something, so they will be sold, hopefully as a job lot else I will be busy on speciliast websites or ebay. Can't say that that is something I am looking forward to.

Afterthought

There is a much (much much - ed) funnier blog about attics and moving written by a chap called, Michael Marshall (Smith) . Well worth a read, as are his books.

The cough that comes with going into the attic for any prolonged length of time has returned. Bizarre, that, the post cough taste, is well, "Atticy", I think that is the best word that I have to describe it. Luckily, it only lasts for a day or so until the lining of my lungs has caused a sufficient number of coughs to clear out all of the "Atticyness", gunk that I inhaled whilst moving and interrogating boxes.

BTW Haven't forgotten about the Tax Cuts for Millionaires blog, it is really just bubbling under. Be available Real Soon Now.