BBC declares Government Horsemeat Meet

The BBC website has got a cracking headline "Government to hold horsemeat summit". I wonder who the runners and riders will be.

Will I be first past the post with this post in finding this funny? (Think you fell at the first hurdle - ed).

Given that we have a Food Standards Agency, a Health and Safety Executive and a plethora of laws and regulations regarding food handling, preparation, safety, packaging, ingredients, use by dates, use before dates etc, it does make you wonder why 'Da Government' need to get involved at all?

I know, they need to be seen to be doing something. But you can see what the outcome of this will be.  The problem will be that it is the ingredients list that is at fault, presumably if it had listed horse meat - all would be well (being a little cynical here - literary ed).

I do wonder if any ones head will roll for this? Makes you wonder what are all these organisations,  soaking up our tax pounds, doing? Can I presume that they are underpaid, under staffed and not fit for consumption?

Commentary (use the voice of Sir Peter O'Sullevan if it helps)

[Starters gun goes off in the background]
"And their off",
"Coming to the first hurdle it's neck and neck, with the 'Environment Secretary' ridden by  Owen Paterson leading the way",
"In a close second there is the Not Fit For Purpose (ridden by FS Aye), closely followed by 'It's The Way I Fill 'Em' ridden by Tess Co and 'Lasagne Delight' ridden by Finn Duss, with Al Di trailing the pack riding 'Special Spaghetti' ",
".. and their over, their all clear",
"Oh no,  there is a faller,' Not Fit For Purpose' ridden by FS Aye is down, and appears to have been trampled by the following runners. I really wouldn't want to be in his shoes"
"They're moving on quickly now to the second hurdle, with 'Environment Secretary' still leading the way",
"He really has got a firm grasp on this race",
"So they're coming to the second and it's still Environment Secretary leading the way, now by a length",
"The rest are trailing behind as 'Environment Secretary' clears the second. Very neat jump",
"Oh my, oh my, there has been a terrible pile up at the second hurdle, with all the other runners down",
"It's a massacre out there, horses falling to the left of me and horse falling to the right of me",
"Let's hope listeners, that none of the runners are hurt otherwise it will be the knackers yard for them"
"So here we are, the only horse left is coming in to the final straight, and its 'Environment Secretary' past the post"
"So I guess he really knew his way around this course"
"So I'm now handing you back to the studio, whilst I go for my well earned lunch"
"Wonder what will be on offer today?"

Final Thought

This whole episode adds a whole new meaning to the phrase, "I am off to curry the horse", (yuk - ed).

BBC's Snow Joke

Well the BBC are at it again. Sending reporters out across the country to stand in snowstorms reporting that it is snowing. How the traffic behind them is managing to keep going (due to gritting and snow ploughs (really - ed))), but on the side roads and minor roads it is dangerous and drivers should take care and only go out if they have to.
Why why why do they do this. Do their reporters get danger money to go out in manky conditions and state the b****** obvious. Does no-one at the BBC think for one moment that most people have the merest inkling of common sense?

They even had a guy overlooking the M5 near Taunton to show that the lane 3 (as it is technically called the reporter said - though everyone else calls it the Fast Lane; though not if you are on the M25 on AnyDay (tm) of the week during peak times) is covered in snow and that the other two lanes are open. They then bring a chap from the IAM (nothing to do with cat food, but the Institure of Advanced Motoring) to remind drivers to keep to the clear lanes and give enough space to the driver in front in case they stop suddenly. They should be doing that whatever the conditions, argh!

We love the weather in this country, I mean it was only a few weeks ago that they were sending out reporters to stand in the middle of flooded high streets in the pouring rain and tell us that it was raining and the town, village, hamlet was flooded, and that drivers should only go out if they have to.

It was only last Spring (2012) that they had reporters standing on the edge of muddy pits (reservoirs) or in the middle of bone dry reservoirs stating that the water levels were very low for the time of the year. This was the proven by the cameraman panning to show the total lack of water or the muddy puddle that was all that was left of the previous winter's rainfall.

I wonder if there is some BBC a weather pay grade that you sign up for. Can you see it, all the reporters up North will be asking to get put on the Snow Grade to report on Snow (as there is no point to be on it in the South - as we never get snow (apart from now - ed)), the reporters in the West (probably Wales) will sign up for the Rain Grade to report on Rain, the reporters in the North West of Scotland will get the High Winds in Winter Grade to report on High Winds in Winter. There is probably a Cold Winds from the Continent grade for the reporters in East Anglia and Kent.

Maybe the BBC just state the obvious to cater for the lowest common denominator.

You can tell that people are listening, as there is no milk and RawToast (tm) (aka bread - ed) available in the supermarkets!

I think it is time for a decent, harrumph. (I didn't get a harrumph from that guy in the corner - name that film - ed)